Bran Stark - The Broken Prince of Winterfell

Aww Bran. It breaks my heart just writing his name. The little Lord of Winterfell who loved to climb until he was thrown out a window by Mr. Kingslayer because Bran saw him having sex with his sister. As if THAT wasn't traumatic enough! And then he almost get killed again because of the same issue. The Lannister twins are worried he might remember the grossness of what he witnessed. And then it didn't even matter anyway because now EVERYONE knows about the incest (not that they can prove it). Here is a picture of Bran before his tragic crippling:

Bran is portrayed by Isaac Hempstead-Wright and he is absolutely perfect for the role. Check out his twitter page here. A "Simpson and Spongebob enthusiast"..how cute is he?! Before Bran's big fall, he gets his own direwolf along with the other Stark children. He calls his wolf Summer and boy is he loyal! He loves Bran so much and saves his life several times throughout the series. Check out this scene.

Catelyn is also pretty badass in this scene

  

Reasons to love Bran: What isn't there to love about Bran really? He actually has a pretty good attitude after getting crippled. He mopes around for awhile, but then he learns to ride a horse thanks to Tyrion. He loves it until he is almost killed by some wildlings. But he has another transportation system in Hodor the stableboy. He is strapped in a basket and carried around by Hodor (who is quite large). Hodor is a a simpleton and very loyal, but sometimes he forgets Bran is in the basket!

Hodor!!

Poor Bran suffers a lot of hardships in his young life. As if it wasn't bad enough being crippled, he is left behind as his father and sisters all go to King's Landing. Granted, things don't turn out so well for them there (dead, a prisoner and a fugitive) but STILL! Bran really wanted to go. Then his mom takes off to avenge his window tossing. Soon after, his oldest brother Robb heads off to war to avenge Ned's death. So Bran is left as the oldest Stark living at Winterfell and he has to do a bunch of boring Lord stuff. He is only like seven or eight years old! And then, as we know, stupid Theon decides to take over Winterfell. This leads to poor Bran and Rickon having to go on the run. Not only that, everyone thinks they are dead! And Bran has to do all this being carried around by Hodor! But he always seems tobe fairly cool about everything and I love it! Oh and he has a "warg" connection with his direwolf, Summer, which is pretty cool. He goes into some weird trance and is able to "become" Summer! This actually helps out him and his friends quite a bit.

 Woof!

Reasons to hate Bran: There is no reason to hate Bran, but sometimes I question his decisions. I don't really want to go into it right now (mainly because I still don't quite understand the whole thing), but Bran decides to go find the "three-eyed crow" because he dreams about it. That darn Jojen Reed talks him into it. I really like Jojen and his sister Meera. They help Bran and Hodor escape from Winterfell and prove to be great allies (Rickon goes another direction if they are caught, the two Stark boys won't be together). But Jojen is impressed with the Bran/Summer warg thing and figures out that Bran dreamt of the three-eyed crow. So they all decide to go seek out this crow and they don't really know where it is! I guess Bran thinks it will teach him to fly or something, which I guess is pretty cool. But wouldn't he rather go find his family to tell them he is alive? I know that really, really mean people are searching for him, but he could maybe make it happen. Poor Catelyn could really use some good news. And the three-eyed crow lives beyond The Wall where all the creepy dead things reside. They even run into Sam! But he is not allowed to tell Jon Snow that his little brother is alive. The whole thing is just weird (including the warg stuff) but I am sure there is a point to it. I am a slooooooow reader and I am thinking that Bran finds the three-eyed crow in A Dance With Dragons.

High School: I am having a hard time picturing Bran in high school. I think he would just be a normal kid who got average grades and has lots of friends. He would most likely be in the school rock climbing club. Well, he would be until he saw the coach having an illicit affair and then he would get pushed off a rock!

Sticks Counterpart: Remember Saucer's post about Jeff Skinner? We have our Bran! Two "babies" who have a lot of heart and strength!

Bran is dreaming he is a hockey player

It came true! Perhaps Jeff is really the three-eyed crow?

~Beddee



Eddard "Ned" Stark - Lord of Winterfell

Yes, I have finally gotten to Ned Stark. Our sweet, naive Ned who is always full of honor. I have held off for awhile, but I really feel I must tell his story. So according to his wiki page, Ned is in his mid-thirties. The eff? Apparently I am just about his same age then! Ha ha, well his portrayer on the show is older, Sean Bean! Of Lord of the Rings fame. I just love him!

You have probably seen this iconic picture of our Ned in a Facebook meme

Here is what we already know: Ned is Lord of Winterfell and House Stark (basically the most important dude in the North). He is married to Catelyn of House Tully and has 5 kids with her (Robb, Sansa, Arya, Bran and Rickon). He also has one bastard son name Jon Snow who represents the ONLY time that Ned was ever dishonorable. But maybe not? Jon Snow Theories Ned is total besties with King Robert Baratheon and later Hand of the King (begrudgingly). Oh Ned! Why did you ever go to King's Landing in the first place?

Reasons to love Ned: So Ned is the character who is prepped as a hero and we love him from the very beginning. Yes, he cuts off that one Wall deserter's head....but that's his job and the guy had it coming! And he even does that honorably. He is a great dad and all his kids love him. As does his wife. Even though he was second choice after his brother Brandon, Catelyn and Ned are solid. Being best friends with the King also doesn't hurt Ned's status in the realm. King Robert wants to marry his son/heir Joffrey to Ned's daughter Sansa and he wants Ned to be the Hand of the King. Well, this is only after his current Hand, Jon Arryn, dies unexpectely. Ned is not planning to accept the offer, but does so after learning that Robert's wife and her family might have had something to do with the death. He worries about his friend's safety and goes to King's Landing with Sansa and Arya in tow. Bran was supposed to go as well, but we all know what happened there!

I love the Stark family!!

More reasons to love Ned:  I am extending the love section because there is so much more to talk about. Ned is a great advisor to King Robert and gives his opinion even if it is unpopular. Like when Robert wants to have Daenerys killed because she is pregnant and he is scared she will come back to fight for the Iron Throne (not an entirely misguided fear). Ned would rather quit being the Hand if it means killing children. Ned is also a super sleuth. He is determined to find out the secret that got Jon Arryn killed and this gets him into a heap of trouble. Turns out, Arryn knew a secret! A big one! Guess what Robert..In the case of Joffrey and your other two children:

It's true! Joffrey is totally not Robert's heir. I don't see how no one figured this out earlier. But they don't have DNA technology in Westeros. They have to rely on the fact that Joffrey is "yellow of hair" and Robert is "black of hair". But all this aside. Joffrey is the product of twincest! His father is his Uncle Jaime!! Now THAT is a good episode of Maury.

Reasons to hate Ned: So it didn't take long for Ned to find out Cersei's deep dark secret. It is what he DOES with this information that makes one wonder if Ned is right in the head. He should have held onto it until the right time came to expose her to Robert. But no, he decides the honorable thing to do is tell CERSEI he knows..and she readily admits everything!



So now does he REALLY think Cersei is going to run off with her kids and never look back? Nope, Cersei uses this time to orchestrate Robert's death and letting Joffrey take the Iron Throne with herself as Queen Regent. And she finds out Ned is planning on heading back to Winterfell (thank you, Sansa) so she has him arrested for treason (thank you, Littlefinger). Ned really isn't supposed to die. Cersei just wants him to confess that he is a traitor and send him to The Wall. Poor honorable Ned wants to refuse, but decides that he will do it for his children. And then. AND THEN! Stupid bat-shit, incest-for-brains Joffrey chops off his head anyway. Even after promising Sansa that he definitely would not chop off her dad's head! So that's that for Ned Stark. Very shocking scene to everyone. Ned was supposed to win everything. Instead, he gets bested by a 13 year old snot.

Everybody Hates Joffrey

High School: Ned would just be a cool guy that everyone loved. Probably on the football team, though not the star player. He would have a nice, steady girlfriend and people would always go to him for advice. His best friend would be the star football player who would be dating the hottest girl in school. Ned finds out she is cheating on him and decides to tell her that he knows rather than telling his friend. She turns against him and gets the entire school to think he is a liar. He would be banished from popular society and eat lunch alone until college.

Let's Mix in Some Sticks: Well, Saucer already covered this one! Ned would totally be Brian Campbell of the Florida Panthers! If you haven't read her post yet, be sure to do so. Brian is very Nedd-ish and full of honor. You have to love the good guy (even though George RR Martin clearly does not)! We need a hockey team called the Direwolves with Brian as captain!

Sigh, I suppose there's always a glimmer of hope that Ned will come back as a zombie or something (like a certain other character who I won't mention just yet..) But even a zombie would have a hard time without a damn head! Ugh, Joffrey!!

~Beddee

Petyr Baelish - Littlefinger

Beddee has been slacking on her blog this week. I blame the onslaught of new televison shows (and old favorites) distracting me from precious blogging time. They aren't Game of Thrones, but there are some pretty entertaining shows out there. But..I am back! And I have decided to profile the one Littlefinger. Behold!

Ick, look at that smug face! Now I am not the biggest Littlefinger fan, but I do admit that he makes things interesting. His real name is Petyr (with a y) Baelish but no one seems to call him that. They call him Littlefinger, but I can't really figure out why. Something to do with his family holdings or whatever. One ASOIAF website claims it is because he is short, but that is just stupid..I don't know. I will just go with it! Littlefinger is very smart with money and even becomes Master of Coin for the King at one point. He owns a bunch of brothels, which makes him a whole lot of money. Despite the fact that his family is pretty low on the totem poll, he manages to become the Lord of Harrenhal AND Lord Protector of the Vale. Not bad Littlefinger! He is also hopelessly in love with Catelyn Stark, almost to an obsessive point. Too bad she is already married to our hero, Ned.

One Solid Couple

Back in the day, Catelyn and LF were very close and he wanted to marry her. But she only thought of him as a friend and was betrothed to Brandon Stark (Ned's brother). Our man Littlefinger challenged him to a duel for her hand and promptly lost. Catelyn was pissed and didn't talk to him for a long time. Not even when Brandon died and she married Ned instead. She eventually forgave him though and he later extended his Catelyn crush to Sansa. Hey, if you can't have the mom, how about her 13 year old daughter? Sansa wasn't into it either. Sigh, but there IS one person of Tully blood who just loves Littlefinger. Lysa! She of the creepy breastfeeding.

Shudder (no offense to the actress)

Though he does eventually use her crush to his advantage, Lysa is no Catelyn or Sansa!!

Reasons to love Littlefinger: Well I suppose Littlefinger should be commended for getting Sansa out of Kings Landing. She would have had a tough time without him. And he is helping her become a stronger and more powerful woman. He is also cunning, smart and witty. And I think he is under the radar so no one really considers him a threat. They underestimate him and I feel that is a mistake. Plus, without him, where would Tyrion find all the good whores? No one runs a brothel like Littlefinger! He is like the Hugh Hefner of Westeros.

Reason to hate Littlefinger: Ugh, he totally betrayed Ned Stark!! Damn him.

Why is Joffrey always everywhere?

This reason alone should make me hate him for the whole rest of the series, but I just can't. I am sure old Ned is spinning (headless) in his grave knowing that Littlefinger has his daughter. But hopefully it will all work out. Littlefinger also kills with no emotion. If someone needs to be dead to suit his agenda, he kills them (or has them killed) without shedding one tear. So he is really like a Hugh Hefner/Dexter hybrid!

High School: Littlefinger would totally be that guy who is always hanging out with the cool kids, but no one can remember how he got popular. With the ability to manipulate the majority of the the student body, he would quickly gain more and more popularity until he was prom king. Although the popular girls would like him, it would only be on a friendly level and never romantic. He would have to settle for the slutty girls who would flock to his side. No one throws a better high school party than Littlefinger. Girls, booze and bling would flow everywhere. Speaking of bling, high school Littlefinger would be covered with it! And he would have a chain wallet.

Let's Mix in Some Sticks: Biznasty, Littlefinger would be Biznasty (real name: Paul Bissonnette) 100%. Both have a dumb nicknames and both think they are super clever. I only really know about Biznasty through Twitter and he comes off as very arrogant. If Littlefinger had the technology to tweet, he would be just like him. Although I don't know a lot about his hockey playing skills, his wiki page doesn't boast a whole lot. So I am thinking he isn't the best player out there. Littlefinger wouldn't be either. They both rely on their so-called wit and charm to gain popularity. Biznasty should go to Westeros and hang out in one of Littlefinger's brothels!

LOL Nice Picture



Ugh, Biznasty would totally betray Ned Stark too! I just hope he doesn't gain as much as Littlefinger probably will in the near future.

~Beddee



Sansa Stark - Princess of Winterfell

Sansa Stark is a great character with many flaws. But she is also one of my favorites. Maybe it's because I can identify with her even though her actions cause a chain of events that totally ruin everything! I give you the infamous Sansa!

Sansa always looks sad, but for good reason. Her life kind of sucks for the majority of the series. But it's all her own doing so it's hard to feel sorry for her. Except, I still do. I think she gets more than her fair share of karma for her mistakes. And it was all because of a stupid boy! This guy:

Ha ha, this picture rules

I really like the actress who plays Sansa, it would be a tough (though fun) role to play. She is played by Sophie Turner who actually has a twitter account! Follow her here: https://twitter.com/Sophiee_Turner. But be warned that she is 16 and like Maisie Williams before her, she will make you feel old! I read an article that tells how she she adopted the dog that plays her ill-fated direwolf, Lady. This gets her extra bonus points from me..check out this adorable picture of the two of them. Awww!

So Sansa starts out with a pretty sweet life. She is the eldest daughter of Lord Eddard (Ned) and Catelyn Stark and is a lady in every sense of the word. She is quite the opposite of her little sister Arya and only wants to possess all the qualities of a young female of her status. She enjoys singing, dancing, embroidery and all other "womanly" activities. But most of all, Sansa likes BOYS! She loves tales of famous knights and dreams of great romance. She is a lot like Saucer in that she develops a huge crush on Ser Loras Tyrell, the Knight of Flowers.

Swoon!! Sansa = Saucer



But what Sansa wants most is to be married to her betrothed, Prince Joffrey (heir to the Iron Throne). But things go south, Joffrey shows his true colors and she ends up married to Tyrion..wtf?!

Reasons to love Sansa: Sansa turns out to be a pretty cool chick and is very smart. Although she ends up as a prisoner, she manages to act the part of a proper lady who is beyond thrilled to marry Joffrey even though he..uh, you know what he does to her daddy Ned. I am not even going to say it!

I must say that Sansa holds up very well considering the circumstances. If it were me, I would have curled up in a little ball and gotten my own head chopped off for trying to kill Joffrey. I just hate that kid! Sansa has to learn how to survive on her own and is plotting her escape throughout the books and is eventually successful. Granted she has to trust that darn Littlefinger, but at least she is better off with him than at King's Landing. Sansa turns the head of many an old dude. We have already discussed her weird relationship with The Hound, but Littlefinger also has a little thing for her. Plus, she is forced to marry Tyrion (more on that in a different post). Luckily, Tyrion is super cool about the whole thing and treats her kindly and she doesn't even have to have sex with him. Thank goodness for his whores! Judging by the end of the fourth book, I am also thinking that Sansa might now be a player (rather than a pawn) in the game of thrones! Go Sansa!

Reasons to hate Sansa: Okay so everything I said in the love section..all of it is Sansa's own stupid fault! She has such a one track mind about marrying Joffrey that she fails to listen to her dad about leaving King's Landing. She is pretty mean to Arya too and is always making fun of her for being a tomboy. Plus, she STILL likes Joffrey even though she sees first hand that he is a big, huge jerk when he has her direwolf killed. But the worst part about Sansa is that she tells freaking Cersei, of all people, of her father's plan to send her and Arya home. This one idiotic move causes a chain of events where all goes to hell and Sansa ends up in her predicament. Way to be a rebel, Sansa, look what you have done!

High School: Oh weren't all us girls just like Sansa in high school? She would be a sweet, pretty girl who would be super interested in boys. Sansa's crushes would range from the popular jocks to the class president. She would put her interest in boys above all else, but would have a close group of girlfriends (also very interested in the opposite sex). Her little sister would be a pest and embarrass her in front of her many crushes. Although she loves her family, Sansa would be a bit of a rebel and stay out too late on her dates. But the worst thing: She would end up dating the cute and horrible son of her dad's boss, tells a secret and get her dad fired!! Oh Sansa..

Let's Mix in Some Sticks: Well obviously Sansa would never EVER play hockey herself. She is far too ladylike for that. She would totally be the head of all trophy wives, Carrie Underwood! Carrie is married to Mike Fisher of the Nashville Predators and is probably the most known hockey wife. Although Sansa is not a huge singing sensation like Carrie, she has been known to charm people with her voice. Carrie and Sansa are both beautiful and smart and have had many suitors. I could totally see Sansa cheering on her hockey husband like Carrie. This is, of course, if her husband is NOTHING like Joffrey (which I am assuming Mike Fisher is not).

Cheering on her hubby!!

Much better than groveling

Hopefully Ms. Sansa Stark will turn out just fine and she can live her dream!!

~Beddee

Arya Stark - Future Assassin

This post about Arya is the final featuring featuring my top four favorite characters. After this, I am going to randomly select characters and their profiles might not be so glowing. Without further adieu, here is Arya!

What a little cutie! But don't be fooled by her innocent-looking appearance. This little girl is deadly when she has to be. As usual, let's take a look at some of her nicknames. Keep in mind, most of these were created by her older brothers and their friends (or mean boys from the Kingsroad). Arya Horseface, Arya Underfoot, Arry (when she is pretending to be a boy), Weasel and my personal favorite, Lumpyhead (or Lumpyface). Arya takes these all in stride. She is a master of different identities throughout the whole book. She is, in realty, a Princess of Winterfell. The youngest daughter of Ned and Catelyn Stark. But she would rather be playing with swords.

Okay, this is the first post where an actor/actress from the show actually HAS a twitter account. Now I can post a link to it like Saucer gets to with her hockey players. The young girl who plays Arya's name is Maisie Williams and her Twitter is a lot of fun. Check it out here: https://twitter.com/Maisie_Williams . But be warned, she might make you feel really old. I really like the character of Arya and think Maisie nails it. Sometimes when you read the books, it seems like it would be hard to find a child actor who can portray such a character. But she does it with ease and really brings Arya to life.

Reasons to love Arya: Arya doesn't take any crap. And she is usually right about everything! If only her sister Sansa would see things the way she does. Sansa is only interested in the boring stuff that's expected of noble girls. And boys. Sigh, Sansa only cares about boys and who she is going to marry. Arya thinks all that is stupid and would rather learn how to fight and maybe be a knight someday. Luckily, her father and brothers indulge her a bit. As mentioned in the previous post, Jon gives her Needle the sword (Needle!!) Her dad, Ned, let's her take fencing lessons from a renowned swordsman (Syrio Forel). When things go to hell and Arya has to pretend to be a boy joining the Night's Watch, she really comes into her own and even a little vicious. But she is smart. Look at her scene here with that weirdo Jaqen H'ghar (who has promised her 3 deaths of people she hates).

Ha ha, take that Jaqen!!

Reasons to hate Arya: I love Arya and there is no reason for me to hate her. I kind of wish Arya and Sansa would have been better friends in the earlier books. Although Sansa pretty much sucks at the beginning, her and Arya could have avoided a lot of trouble had they stuck together. But in the end, it's really Sansa who is at fault and I don't blame Arya in the least. Neither even have direwolves anymore thanks to dumbass Sansa. It might also be hard to like Arya if you are any of the following:

Yes, at 9 years old, Arya has a death list. And (spoiler alert) she is on her way to acheiving every last one of them! Because she is a badass. If she doesn't do it herself, she will find help/get trained in order to do it.

High School: Well, Arya would be the younger sister of a very popular and pretty girl. But don't call her Jan Brady! Unlike her sister, she could care less about her dating life. She would totally be one of those girls who want to join the football team. Some of the guys would make fun of her and call her a boy. But she would have the last laugh by beating their asses. Many a male ego would be ruined in that high school by Arya Stark! Let's see, she would have some friends but if they ditched her, she wouldn't really care. Arya is a loner at heart. Hmm I am trying to think of a modern day equivalent of her mighty sword, Needle? A mighty IPad? No, that doesn't work. Okay, I will just make her have a sword anyway. I take it all back. Arya would totally be a Ren Fair dork who carries around a sword. She would walk around looking like this.

Hopefully, her death list would only mean deleting people from her Facebook account. Viva La Arya!

~Beddee

Jon Snow - You Know Nothing

My third entry is about everyone's favorite bastard, Jon Snow. He really is a fine character even though I think he takes life waaaaaaay too seriously. Lighten up Jon Snow! To be fair, he really does have a lot to deal with. However, he has brought a lot of it on himself.

Jon Snow doesn't really have a lot of nicknames like some of the others. The Bastard of Winterfell, Lord Snow, Lord Crow. All boring! On the Wiki page for ASOIAF, they say he is sometimes called The Black Bastard of the Wall, which is kind of funny. I don't remember anyone calling him that though! My hope is that one day, he hooks up with Dany and they rule the realm together. That's probably the subject of many a fanfiction!

Here is a picture of Jon Snow:

I am a big fan despite the lack of smiling. Seriously, does Jon EVER smile?! Jon is very handsomely played by Kit Harington, who I really enjoy. He sometimes makes Derek Zoolander faces and actually does look like a male model. He always looks so cold which I guess is to be expected. Thank goodness for his pelts!! Let's hope PETA never comes to The Wall, Jon Snow.

Here is a little history of Jon. His dad is Ned Stark (of the noble House Stark). But he can't be called Jon Stark because he is a bastard child. So apparently, bastards in the norrth have to take the last name "Snow" so everyone knows they are a bastard. This seems kind of mean, it's not their fault their dad has a wandering peen! But at least Ned didn't abandon Jon and took him home to my personal favorite castle, Winterfell and raised him with his half-brothers and sisters. His stepmom, Catelyn, is pretty much a raging bitch to him. He reminds her that her husband once cheated on her.

Jon doesn't feel like he has a lot of options in life and is sort of a moody teenager. So he up and joins the Night's Watch and heads to THE WALL without really giving it a lot of thought. I have never really understood this. It seems like people only join the Night's Watch as a last resort and it kind of sucks. Like criminals will go only because it's better than getting beheaded. I mean, look at this thing!

And look what you have to deal with when you go there:

Scary!! And once you join, you can never leave. If you do, you are automatically beheaded. Probably by Jon's own father, Ned Effing Stark!! Oh and you can never marry, have kids or have any fun once you join the Night's watch. I cannot understand why someone would join voluntarily. You have other options Jon Snow!

Reasons to love Jon Snow: Ok, maybe I am being a bit too harsh. Jon is actually a really likeable young man. And I guess I should give him props for taking things seriously. Someone has to in this incredibly dark world. He does get to have a little fun. He is super nice to his friend Samwell when no one else is. And I secretly like when he "joins" the wildlings. When he is with Ygritte, he gets to have a ton of fun! I can't wait until next season when they get to more of their scenes.

Kissed By Fire Ygritte!!

One of my favorite scenes in Season One is where Jon gives "Needle" to his little sister Arya. My heart just melts! Awwww!

Reasons to hate Jon Snow: Honestly, there really aren't any reasons to hate Jon Snow. I mean, just look at him! He is too serious sometimes, but he is brave and trustworthy. I would definitely feel safer knowing he was out there protecting me from all that weird shit by The Wall!

High School: Jon Snow would totally be an angsty teen who didn't hang out with the popular kids. While everyone else was out getting wasted, Jon would be in the library studying up on where he was going to college. He would feel like an outcast in his family even though his brothers and sisters totally love him. He would be a loner, but would befriend the occasional nerd who would look up to him. Girls would totally want to date Jon, but he wouldn't have any interest unless they completely threw themselves at him.

I will end this with a picture of Jon and his sweet direwolf, Ghost. I love that wolf!

~Beddee